I am a person who blogs, the power of affirmation

I spend a fair amount of time reading in the coaching and identity spaces, which makes sense because one of my aspirations is to be a coach and my area of research interest has always been identity and how it impacts life and career satisfaction.  A common theme in much of the reading is the power of affirmations.

So that you, my reader, and I are on the same page, affirmations are statements of truth. The word affirmation by itself can be positive (e.g. I have unique gifts to share) or negative (e.g. I can’t lose weight). The process of affirmation simply adds truth to something we already believe. Some might call it “speaking the truth into the universe.” Whether you are speaking a positive or a negative affirmation, you are making that your truth. When I step on the scale and say, “No matter what I do, I can’t seem to lose weight.” I am making that statement truth. Sub-consciously, I will do small things to support that affirmation (e.g. an extra snack, a second serving, watching another TV show on the couch instead of going for a walk).

We often make affirmations (both positive and negative), without thinking about them. They become part of our routine, and they shape who we believe ourselves to be. For example, If I routinely tell myself I am an outgoing person, I will begin to identify as an outgoing person and I will make behavior choices that support that affirmation.

In the last 4 months, I have had a list of 16 positive affirmations above my computer. I see them, but I do not actively engage with them, nor do I repeat them with any regularity. However, every morning, as I prepare to take my shower, I look in the mirror and say, out loud, “I am handsome, I have some work to do to improve my physique, but I am handsome.” I then check my weight and continue with my day. In the last two weeks (after reading Atomic Habits by James Clear), I have also decided to add, “I am a person who exercises” and I deliberately do 1 push-up before entering the shower. Again, by saying, “I am a person who exercises” and then doing a push-up, I am affirming that belief.  In both these cases, I am making positive affirmations that are impacting how I see myself in the world…I am morphing my identity.

I have seen first-hand that affirmations can be powerful, both negative and positive. The key then is to make sure the things you are affirming (whether positive or negative) are things you want to be part of your future identity. What are the things you are telling yourself? How are the things you are telling yourself guiding you to your future self? If you want to be more outgoing, you might say things like:

            “I am beginning to connect with others.”

            “I am becoming more social.”

            “I make new friends easily.”

            “I am not a person who smokes.”

Regardless, you have the power to control who you show up as every day. Affirmations are another tool in the toolkit that can help you refine your future identity. I challenge you to pick one affirmation that will help you to get closer to who you want to be. Write it down, say it everyday as part of your routine (like I did by adding mine to my morning routine). Make sure that whatever affirmation you pick is something you honestly believe and want for yourself. Do it for 30 days and see where it leads you.

If you are looking for an additional exercise, start reflecting on your day.  Keep a journal of all the things you say in a day that might be learned negative affirmations. Draw attention to them. Re-write them to positive affirmations and every time you catch yourself saying the negative affirmation, counter it with the positive affirmation. Make that a new habit.

You have the power to control who you are, what steps will you take today to seize that power?